Spokane

Had an interesting float yesterday in Spokanistan. Tweaker encounters, justifiably angry locals, one stout rapid and a lost friend.

The trip started out textbook as many others have, we had set shuttle at Please Flat and were parked just downstream of the TJ Menach Bridge in a small parking lot by the river for the put in. I was in a packraft and so was my brother while our (former) buddy was in a hardshell. He had already eddied out and was waiting for us downriver while we were still topping off our boats and getting ready. Upon returning to my vehicle to toss the pumps back in I noticed some dirtbag tweaker had pulled his car right up next to mine, almost hitting it. I asked him if he wanted me to move my car so he could have the one shady spot in the lot (he had a cat in his car)  and he responded with a whole variety of curse words, calling me a faggot and flipping me off as I moved my car. I ended up parking in a small lot right off the side of the road just upstream of the TJ Menach bridge and walked back down to the put in via a small trail. There are a metric fuck ton of tweakers in the vicinity of this bridge, camps all over the place in the woods. I highly recommend putting in at a different location if at all possible, even if it adds a bit of flatwater to the trip. Upon returning to our boats I found that my brother had went off looking for me and had left my wallet, GoPro and other valuables in our boats unattended by the river. I was justifiably upset and we got into a brief argument regarding the matter before settling and getting onto the river.

In the time we spent getting on the river, our buddy had went off and was making his way downstream. We were attempting to catch up to him, even to the point where we were calling his name at the top of our lungs and he was unable to hear us being a couple football fields down the river at this point. My little brother is not as strong of a paddler as the two of us were and we did not know the river at all. We scouted Bowl and Pitcher from the shuttle but we knew Devils Toenail was a bit rowdier. Because of this safety concern we really wanted to link back up but our friend was still paddling away from us. I knew we both had our cell phones on us so I gave him a call. He answered the phone and I asked if he would wait up and I basically got told off saying that he didn't want to paddle with us and he was going to do his own thing. When I told him we weren't comfortable splitting the group and essentially soloing the river (for my brothers sake and for his in case he got into trouble alone) he basically told me that he didn't care and that my concerns were illegitimate because the river was 'pretty chill' so far. I then asked him if he really wanted to leave my brother and I behind and compared that to just leaving him in Spokane and told him that it just wasn't the right thing to do and we should link up. He proceeds to hang up on me and we watch as he pulls into an eddy and throws his boat, helmet and PFD on the rocks in rage before screaming and cussing my brother and I out when we finally caught up to him. We had honestly thought he was just pulling out to wait up for us until we saw the gear get thrown. After we passed by him and his litany of curse words directed toward us, there was a justifiably angry man who was just upset we were arguing on the river. I pulled off to tell him my brother and I were just trying to have a fun run and calm down our enraged friend and he said he was sorry we were having to deal with this and he hopes we get to have fun on the river cause that's why we were out there. We made our way down the river and while we were separated from him, we still made it down picking more conservative lines down the bigger rapids. After exiting the river and running to grab the shuttle car, I came to my friend with open arms in hopes to talk about what happened and resolve the stupid little issue, he basically shrugged me off and left me hanging. If it were up to me he'd still be sitting in Spokanistan after that but my brother was nice enough to drive him  all the way to his home in Bellingham. He's since blocked me and still owes us over $700 for gas as this was at the tail end of a big road trip. Because of this and the fact that he is a volitile individual who could potentially endanger you or others on a trip I must share some information. This individuals name is Patrick McGowan and he currently paddles a blue Pyrana 9R, has a red helmet and a black drysuit. He typically paddles with a black Werner paddle but has been borrowing his buddy's red Powerhouse fairly often. Take caution if approached by him on the river or at the put in/take out as he may snap on you too.

Now onto the actual river experience, or at least as much as we could pay attention to given the circumstances. After putting in at the bridge, there were a few small class I-II riffles separated by stretches of flatwater. As we rounded the corner by the treatment plant we were bummed to see Poop Hole was just a big rock, although at the flows we had we didn't expect much. The water pouring into the river from the wastewater facility smelled like Off bug spray, not fucking cool at all. We passed through some more easy riffles and under the sign that says 'dangerous rapids ahead' and waited through some more flatwater before finally getting into Bowl and Pitcher. I took the right to middle line, hitting the boof off the rock on the right side and then getting into the ledge wave under the bridge in the middle. We stopped and checked out the room of doom on the left side and it is as bad as the description says. The rocks here look horrible and the slots between them are very tight. There was a collection of wood on the far far left side that made the whole thing worse. The rapid dropping out below this was really fun too, not sure if this is a separate rapid or if this is just the bottom half of Bowl and Pitcher but it was cool and had some good waves. After Bowl and Pitcher the river went through another class II rapid before a quick flat stretch and into Devils Toenail. There was a 50-60 foot log spanning from the middle of the river most of the way to the right with only about 20 feet clear on the right. We were unsure if this line went so we opted to take the bigger middle left/left lines. I went left of the big boulder at the bottom of the left line and ended up plugging the funky pourover at the bottom, almost flipped my packraft. My brother took the swifty line right of the rock and held onto it. The far left side (just left of my line) was horrendous, the slots in the rocks with all that water pouring through them was far worse than Bowl and Pitcher and I'm surprised this wasn't mentioned as a hazard in the description. It would have been nice to scout the rapid first but we were just trying to get through the run and get back to my car at the put in before some tweaker messed with it. There were a couple more fun class II rapids after Devils Toenail but as soon as we passed under the power lines the action was over and it was just flatwater. If I wasn't trying to make it back so fast I would've hopped in the river on the right side here there are tons of frisbee golf disks on the riverbed, a few dives down and you could make some serious cash, just don't tell the tweakers or they'll get em all first!

The river was cool, a little slow in spots but just enough to keep you going.